Showing posts with label know. Show all posts
Showing posts with label know. Show all posts

7 Aug 2014

We cannot get the Big Picture -- and it's okay...

We all like to know 'why'.
It stands to reason as we are creatures of reason.
Some of us are happy with a big picture; others need a lot more detail, so social scientists tell us.

Well, I for one am generally happy to begin moving in a direction once I know where the arrow points. But, with some things, details are necessary.... like needing some sign that your kid is really, actually studying, not just being told , "don't worry mom, I'm studying!". Right?



But sometimes, we simply won't get the Big, whole picture no matter how hard to strain to. This is how I found out recently.

My 14 yr old shared with us this year that she feels she is ready for baptism. As pastor-parents, we are delighted! But I must admit that my delight is tainted with some concern. Does she really understand? Is she really ready? I must admit that I agree with a fellow parent here: some of this concern is troubling as what it really reflects may be self-concern that we have done a good job as parents! Ouch!

The sleuth in me began to set to work. What has led up to this point?
You see, my daughter has an extremely questioning mind. When she was six, sitting in the sofa reading something, she suddenly looked up and said out loud, "Isn't it God's fault since He put the tree in the garden in the first place?". This is the first of a long barrage of questions that came, and with each year, they also became laced with a sheen of skepticism.

And then, clear as sky, I could see she no longer read her Bible or prayed. It was painful.

Well, we had spots of light -
she kept asking
she talked and debated with us (rather than turn away)

So yes, I wanted to trace what led to this amazing tipping point.

It wasn't difficult as they were all in the journals of my heart: the moment several years ago I felt God said to "fight for her destiny" and it quickened me to pray and continue creating a home where the spiritual is weaved real into everything and everyday. And then an event or two plus heart conversations... with a river of tears and prayers (mine and several dear fellow-moms) flowing beneath it all....

This is my version of what led to Baptism.

Then, during the service, she went up and gave her testimony. It began, "Hi, I am ...14..and the daughter of not one, but two pastors" to knowing laughter around us. This is all the mention we get by-the-way (the Ouch).

She then goes on to describe what led to this point; and guess what? Her story and mine doesn't fit! Not even an overlap in parts!

I thought God worked and met her in certain ways.
She talked about how God met her in other ways.

I felt a Holy Laugh.

I get it the next morning. My sleuth work isn't bad. It's just what I saw and felt meaningful. Her story is honest. It's what's real to her. And I get it: we cannot get the Big Picture of what God is up to sometimes. But we each have a sliver of it and it is enough for us to take the next step.

Yet moments like these - when we know what we know isn't all there is to know -- well, we bow and give thanks; for that's all we can do!

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are you ways my ways", 
declares the LORD ~ Isaiah 55v8 



As the Psalmist reminds us,
Who can proclaim the mighty acts of the Lord
or fully declare his praise?
~
Psalm 106v2 {emphasis mine}

12 Nov 2013

God is with us, storm-tossed world - Psalm 46

10,000 is a big number. But it's far more than a number when every single digit represents a life, a dream, a promise - each linked to other hearts and hopes. We are simply not capable of wrapping our minds around what it means. Our own little life can already get too much. This week though, we must all take our eyes and look further - the images and numbers must stop us in our tracks; hopefully long enough to make a difference.*

from Mash

from The Guardian

God's people have never lived in isolation. They lived in relation to others - seeking to bless them. This they do well only if they began in the right place. Today's Psalm provides this right place, a starting point. 

It is a worship song written for the instrument that sets the tone for all the other instruments in our modern symphonies. It is the song, the theology that sets the bar for everything else to align to. 
It is about how God is ~

refuge and strength for his people
a ready help when we are in trouble

so that - like this week, as we witnessed the massive destruction and loss from typhoon Haiyan; when the water roar and seethe and even mountains totter and tumble -

we are not afraid.

this is the emotion the truth of God addresses. Fear.

we ought to feel many things: sadness, grief, empathy, compassion, anger at authorities and corruption, angst over human sloth and on.. but we are not to fear for YHWH Sabaoth, the LORD who has armies at his disposal is with us.

I have a live-in Filipino helper who was back in her homeland as this typhoon blasted across. She comes from the region Iloilo. There was much devastation and many lost homes they took years to build from money they remit home from working far away from home and loved ones. Eva, my helper too had saved and helped her family built a small brick house on their farm. When I shared my concern with my daughter, she immediately said, "if it's destroyed we must give her the money to build a new one! Look at those filmsy houses; she must build one with a good foundation!"

A good foundation is critical. Good sturdy material can make all the difference.


Most of all though, a stout heart is what stands the inevitable storms of life. A heart that has learnt to be still, still enough to know in a deep way that God is God, supreme over the world; that God is God, and with us who are his people; simply because we choose to turn our eyes to him and believe.

Be still and acknowledge that I am God,
supreme over nations, supreme over the world. {v10}

What have I seen in my stillness?
I have seen a God so great I cannot define and describe.
I have seen humanity so wretched I know we need a Saviour.
I have seen my own heart filled with many emotions; including a frustrating tension at what to say to my children who asked, "will it come to Singapore?... Phew!"
I have seen that the losses will truly be in vain if we will not allow them to tutor our hearts toward contentment and compassion.

Why don't you shut off the news and turn inward and be still before God. Being still will lead to a knowing you need for the living you long for.